Getting Out There Again

 

I'm feeling good right now. A little over-caffeinated. But good. Plus I did the caffeine thing to my own self, so, I can't really complain. I just did three brave (for me) things in a row. I went to the store where I used to work as a smoothie bar person and asked a former coworker to be a reference on a new job application. Then I applied for a new job. Then I asked ANOTHER old coworker from a different old job to also be a reference for me. 

That was really hard for me. I guess that's why I guzzled up all that caffeine. I needed the liquid courage. Asking people for help is scary for me. And getting out there and applying for work again is also really scary. I got hurt at my last retail job. I really loved my job there. Technically my job ended because of the pandemic, but the actual mechanics of losing the job left a bad taste in my mouth and I have avoided putting myself back out there ever since. 

My Freelance Journey: Goodbye Fancy Website

The minute I announced I was a freelancer, I felt the pressure to create a rad, sleek website. Sheldon and I spent hours and hours making www.lucyrosetillcampbell.com. On the site I had most of the basic things you expect from an artist's website: An About Me Section, a portfolio of my art, a contact page and I also had a place for people to sign up for my zine-selling business. 

My Freelance Journey: Kind of a Downer

I have been trying to tune my mandolin as a way of procrastinating from writing today's blog post about freelancing. The tuning is not going very well, but for a while it was working as a way to put off writing. 

I've got to be honest, you guys. Writing about myself as a freelancer today seems really daunting. I've been feeling so ashamed of my career (or lack thereof) the past few days that the prospect of writing about it seems terrible. 

My Freelance Journey: I’m Proud of You, Me

I want to talk about three things I am actually proud of in the way I have handled my freelance business so far. In my last post I got a tad...sarcastic...about some of the choices I have made in my quest to become a freelance illustrator.

Being silly and hyperbolic is one way I cope with things which, in reality, scare me or intimidate me--like being a freelancer! As I mentioned in this post, MANY things about freelance scare me. 

But today, as a way to even out the high levels of sarcasm (and let's be honest, this one of those weeks where I could use a boost of confidence!) I want to focus on the things that make me proud. 

My Freelance Journey: Business Insanity

Have you ever had a very small child explain something to you in an extremely condescending way? You listen and nod. You're respecting the truth of the three-year-old who is explaining why hiding all your money in a hole is a good investment, but you are also not letting go of the fact that the three-year-old is not your best bet for financial consultation. 

In freelance years I am a two-year-old. I started my freelance career in October 2018. So I feel a little like the three-year-old giving financial advice to adults. 

My Freelance Journey: Instagram

"Lucy Rose, it's just an Instagram post, don't worry so much about it."

I felt foolish for feeling taken aback--even a little stung--at Sheldon's comment. I wanted to say to myself, "Yeah, take a chill pill, Till. This is just social media!" 

But the comment made me pause long enough to examine my reaction and realize why my relationship to Instagram means so much to me.

My Freelance Journey: The Portrait Lady

I made a lot of money making portraits at events and via social media. I was developing a decent following of people who really liked my product. If I had wanted to, I could still be doing it. In fact, I think I could have actually made it into a career. But instead of fostering my portrait business I let it gradually dry up. 

My Freelance Journey: A Brief History

Zines. Dog portraits. Children's book illustrations. Art in coffee shops. Portraits at the Farmer's Market. More Zines. Those are just a few of the things I have tried ever since becoming a freelance artist in 2018. It has been quite a ride. Today I want to give you A Brief History of My Freelance Journey just to catch you up on where I am now. I hope to devote more detail and time to certain aspects of my journey later, but for now: just the broad strokes. 

My Freelance Journey: Fears

"You're a mess." 

This is something my grandmother told me a lot during my year in Texas, which lasted from 2018-2019. I know to her it was meant to be a form of endearment--spoken in a loving, eye-roll way when I would do something unexpected (to her) or unusual (to her!). 

It still kind of stung, though. Who wants to be a mess? But it also stung because it's not that far from the truth about me, especially when it comes to my freelancing. I AM a mess. 

My New Series About Freelancing

I want to write about my journey as a freelance artist here on Lucy's Life. The last couple years have been so interesting, frustrating and scary. I think that this space could be perfect for talking honestly about it. I hope that my experiences could help inspire someone else or help them feel a little less alone.