Wednesday, September 14, 2016

The Smoothie Diaries: The Beauty in Accuracy


Working in food service requires a number of skills: people pleasing, efficiency and multitasking are the main ones. But I am proud of a more obscure skill: I can exact right amount of smoothie. When I make a smoothie there is nothing left over in the blender after I have poured it. This is the king of my smoothie bar accomplishments. I have perfected the ratio of banana to grape to apple so that if a customer orders a sixteen ounce kale smoothie -- I make sixteen ounces of smoothie. 

No waste. No leery customer saying, "Are you going to throw all that out?" No small animals peering over the top of the counter as though around a watering hole, hoping to get their snouts in to the leftovers. No congealed smoothie clinging to bottom of the blender. Ok, you get it. 

Of course I am the only smoothie barista with this particular obsession. This can be hard for me if I am watching while they make an eighteen ounce smoothie for a sixteen ounce cup. Deep breathing as they wash the rest down the drain. Must. Have. Self. Control. 

Sometimes I just can't take it. I snatch the blender out of the incompetent's hands and make it myself. As I thrust appropriately sized wads of kale into the blender as I growl something along the lines of, "You wasteful creature. Have you no idea how to correctly gage the amount of bananas requisite to make a sixteen ounce smoothie?!"

So maybe I don't actually do that. But you get the point: Smoothie amount accuracy (SAA) is a high priority in my book. It is not even about the Save the Planet aspect, although that is part of it. It is more about the art of perfection. Like finding a beautiful box that is the perfect size for a particular object. It matters in and of itself. So let's get it right, People. 


  1. I love you. You are hilarious. Keep up the SAA work.

  2. Hi,

    The suggestions depends on the assumption that you are not a foodie. A foodie would arrange for more than a blender no matter what. In that case, you are in a good position to follow a healthy diet. Besides boiling is perfect for health, as compared to frying and other complicated stuff. Food that can be cooked easily is the healthiest food. I am not considering the ready to cook options :)

    Ideally soups, like chicken soup, simply boiled with pepper, chili and some other herbs can be a good option.

    Boiled noodles are a good and easy option, along with vegetables/proteins.

    Pancakes/ momos etc. can be steamed. Idli, a south indian dish which is steamed fermented rice mix. It is low carb and tasty.

    Pulses and rice make a good combination for boiled food.

    In order to make the food tasty, you can add spices like ginger, garlic, chilli etc to the boiled recipe that you are making.

    Top 10 Best Hand Blender Reviews can be used to make different kind of juices which will be all low carb without sugar.

    Sprouts/ puffed cereals are another very good option for snacks or breakfast.

    These are few options I could think of. Hope it helps!