Three Things: Why I Cut Off All My Hair

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I am sitting in the swivel chair of a salon here in downtown Wheaton. My computer is in my lap. Around my neck is a black cape. On my head is goopy stuff and very little hair. I just got it all cut off.  It took two hours to carve away the thick, dark hair from my head. But now it is in a short pixie cut. Except for the very top, it is as short as my husband's hair! I have never done anything this crazy with my hair. What prompted this insanity? Well, let's talk about that...

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1. Curiosity
I have always wanted to know what it would feel like to have very little hair on my head. How would the wind feel when there weren't tendrils of hair flicking my cheeks? How would it be to wash a thatched head of hair and run my fingers through the close crop? Would I look good? I have never been able to pull off the "gamin" style of Audrey Hepburn, with her straight bangs and wide yes. My hair was always too wild — more "woodland creature" than "sheik Parisian". But I find that I love this look on me. My eyes pop with my darker brown hair colour and my long neck is more accentuated. I also didn't expect this, but my ears are more visible than ever. They are quite nice as ears go, if I do say so myself.

2. Convenience
Ten to twenty minutes. that is how much time I would usually spend on my hair on a given day. I would style it. Restyle it and then restyle it again. I hated to wear it down, because I hated the distraction of it brushing my face and flipping into my eyes. It took two hours to air-dry, but if I blew it dry than it was frizzy. Even then it was frizzy and out of control most of the time. Honestly, I derived more anguish than joy out of my hair. Now that my hair is so short I can wash it in no time and the only preparation I have to do in the morning is rearrange my bedhead.

3. Character
My hair has always been a piece of my identity. People associate me with my wild, brown hair. I think that in their minds it reinforces their perception of me as a kooky, creative person. I play this up by drawing illustrations and caricatures of myself with curly hair. But now I want to explore who I am without this defining feature. Cutting all of my hair off is a way of branching out from that persona. As a child I remember adults constantly commenting on the little girl with pretty curls. It bothered me to be talked about. I wanted people to focus more on what what coming out of my mouth and mind than out of my hair follicles. I wished that I could have hair like my brothers: short, easy to manage and non-interesting. I had to spend several minutes each day wedged between my mother's knees getting a comb wrenched through my hair. It was not an experience that helped us bond. I was mad at my mom for hurting me and my mom was mad at me for squealing and squirming.

Now that I am shorn I am beginning to reap the benefits I have always dreamed of. There are some downsides: I find that I miss the sensation pulling my hair into a ponytail at the end of the day. My head is also cold most of the time. But beyond those things, it is super fun. Sheldon is a fan, by the way. I wouldn't have done something this drastic if he was majorly opposed. Thankfully he wasn't!
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